Overlooking Choice Poem by Jessica Dehn

time to face the truth, good writing, thanks,

jessica, i will insert my suggested changes/corrections [[within brackets]]. Now to over look [[overlook]] what is before our eyes, that is a mountian [[mountain; oops! ]] of defeat. When we cover our eyes and build up that revealing [[concealing? ]] film [[, ]] we hide from the truth and lay [[lie]] with the lies. [[ a lot of people mess up trying to use lie and lay 'properly'; you are NOT alone! ]] That is a challenge of a whole life time [[lifetime]]. though i kinda cluttered up your stanza with brackets, i felt this stanza was my favorite one. for some people especially, it is good advice to strive to prevent or remove the film which 'clouds' reality in their lives. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - well, i liked this stanza a lot also, but i would capitalize each, as it begins a sentence. i noticed that you were inconsistent in how you chose to capitalize words in this poem. look and see what i mean. :) A game we play unwittingly. I'm a player, you are a player, we are all players of this board game of life. each turn we make the choice to face what is ahead of us or hide away to roll again ........nice! am i really a player? maybe. - - - - - - - - - - - - - i get the imagery of playing a game with dice, but i don't know enough about using the dice to know the significance of rolling 'double six'. i'll take your word for it, that it tells a player to face what is ahead. thanks for sharing. :) bri

you wrote Suffercating, i spelled it 'suffacating', Google spells it 'suffocating'. Google wins. .. to hard to overcome. .... too hard. ya know, i just looked up at 'Suffercating' again, and it struck me that it starts with suffer. could that be significant? could you have MEANT to misspell it? i wonder. being suffocated would probably be included under the heading of 'suffering'. - - - - - - - - here is some clarification to go with the word overlook: [i sent a message to you re 'over look' vs. 'overlook'.] - - - - - - - - - - - - o·ver·look verb verb: overlook; 3rd person present: overlooks; past tense: overlooked; past participle: overlooked; gerund or present participle: overlooking 'ov?r'lo?ok/ 1. fail to notice (something) . he seems to have overlooked one important fact synonyms: fail to notice, fail to spot, miss he overlooked the mistake ignore or disregard (something, especially a fault or offense) . she was more than ready to overlook his faults synonyms: disregard, neglect, ignore, pay no attention/heed to, pass over, forget More his work has been overlooked ignore, not take into consideration, disregard, take no notice of, make allowances for, turn a blind eye to, excuse, pardon, forgive she was almost willing to overlook his faults pass over (someone) in favor of another. he was overlooked by the Nobel committee 2. have a view of from above. the chateau overlooks fields of corn and olive trees synonyms: have a view of, look over/across, look on to, look out on/over, give on to, command a view of the breakfast room overlooks the garden 3. archaic supervise; oversee. 4. archaic bewitch with the evil eye. they told them they were overlooked by some unlucky Person noun North American noun: overlook; plural noun: overlooks 'ov?rlo?ok/ 1. a commanding position or view. he veered off the highway onto an overlook - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - as i said in my note, it is getting late at night. i want to study this poem more before i comment more, AND before my wife yells at me. bri ;) [remind me if i don't get back to this within a couple of days.] thanks for sharing.

This is so poignant, absolutely fabulous and had touched me. Well done

Thank you for your comments. i'm glad you enjoy it!

I love the ending, that.. Is great!