Clever Fella, My Fold Up Umbrella Poem by Stevie Taite

Work here has been slow of late
I'm a fair weather recluse
The other hand bag 'hang outs'
get an awful lot more use

My canopy's been folded
Held in place by Velcro strap
I lost my cover long ago
(an unfortunate mishap)

I long to stretch my metal ribs
And lock my tiny joints
My fabric is a wondrous sight
With nippled ferrule point

The sound of pitter patter
Excites my buttoned springs
They'll nip you like a playful pup
They're temperamental things!

When I can be made use of
To catch and steer cloud bursts
I wish the rains be generous
To quench the grounds great thirst

I'm not good on a blust'ry storm
It's a skill you have to learn
to keep me pushed into the wind
Or inside out I'll turn

But I'll make no apologies
In showers I'm ok!
For wind proof reinforcement
A lot more you will pay

And generally they don't fold up
They are so cumbersome
But me, I'm with you all the time
And not just sat at home.

And when you shake the excess off
As to the door you get
With out the shelter that I give
You'd be a lot more wet!