Yasmeen Khan


Bonsai


Emerald verse
Bejeweled with
Rubies ablaze
Pruned rhymes
In neat syllables
Boughs in prime
Beauty in miniature
As mirrored in a dew
Dwarf in stature
But celestial growth
Essence of forests
Tall in some grove
Now caresses a pot
A delightful trove
Rests on a sill
Kissed by sun
In breeze it thrills
Delights my heart
The work of artifice
That rests in a pot

Submitted: Tuesday, May 07, 2013
Edited: Wednesday, September 18, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

When I saw a beautiful picture of a hibiscus bonsai

Comments about this poem (Bonsai by Yasmeen Khan )

  • Rookie - 442 Points Yasmeen Khan (5/13/2013 8:04:00 AM)

    Thanks for comments and review. I will try to improve upon it. (Report) Reply

  • Bronze Star - 2,993 Points Wahab Abdul (5/13/2013 6:30:00 AM)

    lovely one but if i say one negative point of the piece that would be that the narration is lacking a kick or punch and that is too flat....... (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 534 Points Chandra Thiagarajan (5/11/2013 7:29:00 AM)

    Just as the bonsai arrests our attention your poem is arresting and lovely, Jasmeen! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 19,088 Points Valsa George (5/9/2013 11:21:00 AM)

    This poem is a bonsai of your description! A beauty in miniature, a dwarf in stature and bejewelled with rubies ablaze! ! A truely great poem! ! Thank you for your sweet comment and your interpretation of my poem in all dimensions intended! ! (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 701 Points Shahzia Batool (5/8/2013 11:47:00 AM)

    a concentrated piece...beautiful! (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 39,733 Points Aftab Alam Khursheed (5/8/2013 11:19:00 AM)

    every word chosen is shining, Rests on a sill, Kissed by sun//The work of artifice, That rests in a pot skilfully crafted with the meaning deep than (Report) Reply

  • Bronze Star - 2,037 Points S.zaynub Kamoonpuri (5/7/2013 11:13:00 PM)

    An exquisitely crafted poem. Do coment mine too. (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 963 Points Saadat Tahir (5/7/2013 12:23:00 PM)

    lovely to read and easy on the tongue
    the short and sparse style adds a diminutive charm to the whole thing
    liked

    cheers
    :) (Report) Reply

Read all 8 comments »

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