Blocking You Out Poem by Ace Of Black Hearts

I'm writing this just for you.
You'll probably never read it.
I accept that as the way it has to be.
I accept that your too busy waste you time on little old me.
I pushed and I shouldn't be surprised by the given response.
I treated you like the enemy, when all you wanted from me was a friend.
And in the end, I can't, and you can't.
Becoming so distant.
It's ice on a hot summer day.
Trying so hard to just walk away.
The feelings are fading, trying to forget everything.
Words kept close to the heart.
When loves just not enough.
Blowing the dust off this shallow cut.
Trying to keep it clean.
Trying so hard to not to get an infection.
You don't need me, you never did, and I showed you just that.
Now there is nothing left between us.
I don't want the responsibility of taking care of things when your gone.
Not if you can't face me now.
I have no shame in admitting that I love you, but if it's not mutual why bother.
If it has to be forced, then it's not real no matter the proposition.
The connections have been crossed.
And my emotions have been shorted out.
Going numb, while you're playing dumb.
This is my shield, this is my wall, and you'll never get through again.
Everything is now small talk.
Just whispers in my head as an after thought.
Pretty pictures used as lies that we can even still relate.
In attempt to keep me around long enough with the promise of your trust.
What if I don't want it, what if I told you it is just not enough.
Being treated like unwelcomed guest that you have take in.
But only for your benefit.
I see it so clearly.
I can survive without, I'll do just fine, always have.
Making you a distant memory.
Why is it so hard to just let go?
Why can't I be like you?
Instead I feel the nail your trying to drive into my chest every single day.
I don't want to care, I don't want to be a slave to the minilpation of a emotion in which I have no control.
Blocking thoughts of you with constant music, and constant busy work.
I'm sorry today I just can't be reached.