Stolen From Me Poem by Andrus Cassian

The spear piercing through my brain...
the thorn twisting and cutting through my heart...
What could you possibly expect of me
to be caring or thoughtful, to rush to your defense
What do you want me to say, to do
Your mind is unpredictable, your motives unclear
How could you honestly consider calling
like I would suddenly come running back to you
after you consistently used different torture devices to subdue me
This is just a useless issue I find impossible to endure
You have already stolen three long months of my life
A game of charades, cat and mouse must be your mating call
but you will never attract me again
I hope I can follow through this time
Every single second I feel I've escaped you
like a predator, there you are, stalking me waiting to kill
laughing wickedly of how you still have me cascaded around your finger
or how I'm your seven inch toy to be put to use and thrown away
How much of this is true...maybe all of it
Still burning a hole in the pages of my thoughts
guided by my list of I don't cares or could care less
knowing I could care more than I care to bear
This is all apart of my inner society
but the processes in my heart
I pray it doesn't bring me back to a start I disapprove
One more time, I don't think I can handle
one more line, shoot me in the eye with a bow and arrow
I'd rather fork over my eyesight than
lay a witness to an evil I once thought I loved
The spear in my thoughts...the hole in my heart...
the dark weather my attitude submits to...the thorn in my side...
you are no longer an angel of mine
no longer welcome in my field of vision
but like a thief, my focus remains on the world you stole from me...
How can this be...what do you expect from me...