Still Whispers Her Name Poem by Andrus Cassian

Pain, my enemy and my closest friend
please I beg of you, spare me your presence this day
Please
I'm tired and lost the will to fight you off any longer
Please; just hold me tightly, comfort me if you will
so I can feel the warmth of a touch
fill a void, well at least temporarily
Can you answer a question for me
Why do I torture myself like this
why do I subject myself with prying eyes
to watch her, Penelope, enjoy life with a tremendous smile
while mine is swinging on a grandfather clock
attempting to buy time
Everything she's shared with me, all we've been through
won't fade from me, I refuse to lose it
How did I fall for her complicated splendor
maybe it was all in her eyes or maybe she caught me by surprise
Just..how can it be over after everything I told her
What do I hold now since she's forbidden from my presence
The thing that still beats her name softly like a whisper
calls to fight for her, calls to spin her around and kiss her
yet I'm too inexperienced, too much of a coward
so I let it all implode while I'm a neutron star on the outside
She's all I cared about. my dear Penelope
but I pick up a leaf
no significance, just for some peace
just to have something to rip and tear apart
Watch and be amazed
I'm the human paper boy
being ripped and torn apart to resemble a dying man
resting on the bottom of the ocean