Jahan zaib

Rookie - 70 Points (February 05,1981 / Malakand Pakistan)

Moon Enchanting


When suddenly the clouds
Covered the face
Of moon enchanting
My heart sank
Deep, deep inside
Wanting not to come up
And see my only companion
Matchless beauty
Being attacked
By a dark enemy
When I had no one to speak to
When all had vanished and pulled their hands
In days and nights
Of miseries
O’ moon
You were the one
Who called me
From above and sides four
You took me to thine arms
Held me tight
Drank every drop of my tears
Removed all my fears.
Only me and you
Made a company
Of two broken hearts
But now
When you are not visible
I think within heart mine
Is it something
That has hid
Your beauty from my sight
Or something
You took as a veil
To hide from me
And now dear Moon
I fear myself.

Submitted: Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Edited: Saturday, June 01, 2013

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Comments about this poem (Moon Enchanting by Jahan zaib )

  • Bronze Star - 2,949 Points Wahab Abdul (6/4/2013 11:51:00 PM)

    ah! the moon, very enchanting and the night is very soothing, very lovely....love it....10 (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,229 Points Thomas A Robinson (6/2/2013 10:59:00 AM)

    Like the moon your love is in the beautiful nightime sky surrounded by diamonds of lights, but
    now the clouds of destiny have shuttered her away from you. Now separated from the one you love
    you are no longer a stable ship under sail for your rudder of love is no longer there and your ship is wandering aimlessly the seas. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 336 Points David Wood (6/1/2013 5:26:00 AM)

    Very personal and emotional write. I like it (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 340 Points Captain Cur (5/31/2013 1:00:00 PM)

    Very emotional write with a strong personal finish. (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 3,639 Points Dave Walker (5/30/2013 10:58:00 AM)

    A very beautiful poem, a wonderful write. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,993 Points S.zaynub Kamoonpuri (5/29/2013 11:50:00 PM)

    A fascinatin poem pennd in a sublime way, enjoyable to read. I luv d moon so how u drew d analogy sounds real fine. Pls do read my latest poem too. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 12 Points Farah Ilyas (5/29/2013 11:48:00 AM)

    Enchanting moon is always there to accompany you, sometimes just play hide & seek to see your worth for that, but it doesn't mean that moon is away from you, moon exists in your heart, feel it.....great poem with a great use of metaphor moon..have deep sorrow inside: -( (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,092 Points Unwritten Soul (5/29/2013 7:15:00 AM)

    Moon can away from you....just sometimes in a phase of hardness, you will never find a month without a shine from it....hold it my words, and you will know the enchanting moon always there_Soul (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 39,733 Points Aftab Alam Khursheed (5/29/2013 3:04:00 AM)

    beautiful poem about moon ....nice poem (Report) Reply

Read all 9 comments »

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