one eyed hawk
stretches its half thawed wings
aims for an eye
''a difficult job for someone like me! I feel like packing up till next 'season'! '' are you joking? You are much better than 90% of PH members posting their haiku poems here.. and you are just a beginner! You're good.. you have just to pay attention
Thank you for your kind words. But yes, I need to read some articles focusing on classic haiku only..what I get lately is only the mixed once validating and praising all the hybrids! ! I find it interesting though, will keep working on it whenever I get time.
again: - no 'kireji' here - and some doubts * about ''a one eyed bird aiming for another eye''.. (* as a 'classical concept')
your question: - ''can some of the words like 'thaw' (indicating winter) be used as season word? '' - Not in this case. 'thawing' can be good for 'end of Winter/beginning of Spring', but when refers to snow/ice, not to a bird's wings
Purist haiku seeks only the clear picture..a difficult job for someone like me! I feel like packing up till next 'season'! ! Thank you for your guidance ☺
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
''-I would practice more haiku if only I could keep my sleepy eyes open! '' :))) mmm.. it'd be almost a senryu ** ;) ''would practice haiku more if only could keep my sleepy eyes open'' ** no a true one.. just a joke, of course :)
Haha and the irony here-I fell asleep soon after reading few lines from the book that Dr. Birgit sent!