Phil Soar

Silver Star - 4,327 Points (28.06.1952)

Facebook Poem by Phil Soar


I must get onto Facebook,
And share my every whim;
Tell people when I've had a shit,
Or just been down the Gym;
I'd open up my heart and soul,
And SPREAD eternal joy;
And tell the world how much I wanked,
When I was just a boy.

Id fill my site with Happy Thoughts,
And even product placing,
I'd photograph the skid-marks,
On my pants that need replacing;
Each day I'd write a daily blog,
With banal thoughts and ditties,
Post photos of me on the bog,
And flaunt my manly titties.

I'd keep the world a-breasted,
About everything I'm doing,
I'd keep my page updated,
Whilst I'm sitting down and poo-ing;
MY LAPTOP resting on my lap,
That's how it got its name,
My finger rips the toilet paper,
Now that is a shame.

An accidental Fingering,
Whilst sitting on the Loo,
Not the sort of thing I'd share,
Will all the Facebook crew;
But someone sends a link to me,
That takes me somewhere crude,
A site of toilet paper holes,
And fingers brown and stewed.

I can't believe the sort of stuff,
That people share out there,
Who tells the world their every move? ,
Do people really care? ;
And, Do we need to know all that? ,
Our lives all stripped and bare,
With every move and the things we do,
Why feel the need to share? .

There are those who also twitter,
Their lives awash with Twits,
Sharing every thought they have,
And getting on our Tits;
From stars of stage, and sport and news,
And those who live alone,
Tweeting when they've woken up,
And lying there alone.

They've all got their own followers,
Like some religious cult,
Tweeting crap and talking shite,
And writing to insult;
The need to reach out daily,
To tell the world their news,
To txt, to tweet, words from the street,
And all their insane views.

On second thoughts, I will not join,
Or share my daily grind,
I'll leave it all to those of you,
Who are out of your mind,
You tell the world your secrets,
You share most every day,
With people you don't really know,
Who might live far away.

So if you are on Facebook,
Or hashtag your life on twitter,
I hope the words you share out there,
Don't end up I.T. Litter,
I Do declare, that I don't share,
My feelings, thoughts and deeds,
Or try to share my drivel,
Till my brain explodes and bleeds.

Submitted: Friday, July 25, 2014

Topic of this poem: Funny


Do you like this poem?
2 person liked.
0 person did not like.

Form:


Read this poem in other languages

This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.

I would like to translate this poem »

word flags

What do you think this poem is about?

Comments about this poem (Facebook by Phil Soar )

  • Bronze Star - 2,652 Points Elizabeth Padillo Olesen (3/16/2015 4:47:00 AM)

    Very entertaining indeed. A very good expression of one's own way of looking at the social media and the personal choice one is free to have. Thanks for sharing. Great flow of the language. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,327 Points Jak Black (2/18/2015 8:37:00 AM)

    Great stuff. Liked the humour, the rhyme and rhythm made it so easy to read. Think you shared a secret or two of your own in this one though. Ha ha. Well done Phil. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 16,059 Points Mandolyn ... (7/25/2014 2:28:00 PM)

    you should post this poem on Facebook.
    i laughed.: -D (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 37 Points Uttam Dey (7/25/2014 2:07:00 PM)

    Lolz! ! Nicely written... :) (Report) Reply

Read all 4 comments »

Famous Poems

  1. Phenomenal Woman
    Maya Angelou
  2. Still I Rise
    Maya Angelou
  3. The Road Not Taken
    Robert Frost
  4. If You Forget Me
    Pablo Neruda
  5. Dreams
    Langston Hughes
  6. Annabel Lee
    Edgar Allan Poe
  7. Caged Bird
    Maya Angelou
  8. If
    Rudyard Kipling
  9. Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
    Robert Frost
  10. A Dream Within A Dream
    Edgar Allan Poe
Trending Poets
Trending Poems
  1. Invictus, William Ernest Henley
  2. The Vanity of Human Wishes (excerpts), Samuel Johnson
  3. Still I Rise, Maya Angelou
  4. Phenomenal Woman, Maya Angelou
  5. The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost
  6. If You Forget Me, Pablo Neruda
  7. Caged Bird, Maya Angelou
  8. Daffodils, William Wordsworth
  9. Dreams, Langston Hughes
  10. Annabel Lee, Edgar Allan Poe
[Hata Bildir]