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(09/28/1954 / Flushing)

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Eye of the Tiger


Tiger, Tiger burning bright
hunts his prey by neon light
Real or bleached, you know the kind
big up front with a sweet behind..

Tiger, tiger, none too bright
Left his cell phone in plain sight
When Elin saw his contact list
She grabbed his driver in her fist.

Four hundred yards straight off the tee
Tiger drives that easily
But when his little wife went clubbing
His face and lawn both took a drubbing

Tiger Tiger burning bright
Doesn’t like the bright spotlight
Yet on his off days he’d resort
To pros who play a different sport

Tiger Tiger made a tape
of Tiger 'eagaling' his date
It came into the hands of 'Vivid'
If they release it he'll be Livid

Tiger, tiger lost Gillette
And Gatorade sent their regrets
Now he’s hawking Trojan’s Wares
and lady Clairol for Blonde hair.

Submitted: Monday, December 14, 2009
Edited: Thursday, July 08, 2010


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Comments about this poem (A Light before Dying (Dark humor) by John F. McCullagh )

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  • Bri Edwards (2/11/2013 5:34:00 AM)

    while googling eagaling i ran across eagling, a golf term, and eagleing, a very interesting word which i don't recall seeing used re tiger woods, but, then again, i don't read the sports page. actually i didn't connect
    tiger to the golfer until the end of the poem. very cute, but you did make up a little bit at the end, didn't you?
    thanks for sharing. it will have to go in mypoemlist and i may share it with some golfers i know. i ran across this when looking at 'poems about with the word tiger'. interesting find.

    4 person liked.
    5 person did not like.
  • Chuck Audette (2/17/2010 5:31:00 PM)

    This is a 10+, hilarious! Wonderful satire! -chuck

  • Ruth Walters (2/12/2010 12:56:00 PM)

    haha, very witty little ditty

    Ruthie

  • Lillian Thomas (2/4/2010 3:27:00 PM)

    I think you confused me with someone else and replied to me about this poem which I just now read. It is very clever, and witty with a playful tone, not judgmental or finger waggish, if you know what I mean.
    Imitating William Blake's 'The Tyger' seems clever on the surface but I m not sure it's such a good fit.

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