Crushing Fear Poem by Ace Of Black Hearts

Hello there
Do you even notice me as my voice hovers in the air.
So desperate to get you attention.
Is it pathetic?
Just maybe, it's right up my alley.
Expression through writing is what I know better all else.
I will stutter and stumble.
Face to face.
Embarrassed.
Feeling like a disgrace.
Shame shall be his name.
Time to explain if I only knew why.
Looking through foggy eyes.
So tired of all the damn lies.
Reasons compromised.
Wearing a disguise, and not for the looks I hide.
Exploring the possibilities of chasing after a distant sunrise.
An uncomfortable silence.
Feeling so awkward when being social.
I don't belong, not there, not at that dance.
Not a given chance.
Memories stained with experiences lived.
Always looking for escape, a get away.
So afraid, but of what is a question that repeats.
Crippled from your presence, I can't even look.
Paralyzed, disassociating.
I need my distance.
Too close, please no touching.
Jumping out of my skin.
Shaking, mentally breaking.
Catatonic, comatose.
What is wrong with me.
The room is small.
The music is so loud.
Yet I'm stuck in this shroud.
So this is what I do, is run, run, run.
Out of breath.
Reaching for my destination of the next.
Welcome to the complexities of my confession.
Cold sweat, dripping wet.
No matter the words used to describe it.
None will ever do.
I just wish I could talk to you like a normal human.