Beyond Yesterday Poem by Samir Actuated

I never loved calculating the costs
And yes the other life was eagerly waiting for me
The drinks not as much
It was the joy
The happy hours
Now here I am
Ends not meeting
In my misery I tagged them along
In my self hate I have lost them
I can't say it again and they can't ask
It is so perplexing and in it lives my apologies
Am trying hard to love
They say I should come first
But its hard when lonely
The burdens do no good now
I need to forget them in the past and accept hate
The jewelry needs another hold up with this breath
that I waste on our mistakes