Why Do I? Poem by Nassy Fesharaki

Why do I?

Not as first I start
-but have said many times:
- "Look at pigs…:
-this has roots, possibly
-in short-long emotions
-on police…

I recall my early encounters

Around five, was a child
-and got lost
-then was found
-by police; and was fed,
-respected like prince.
-Long after I found out
-the reason…

Dad's friend had called them
-he held high positions
-let's call it connection
- "hypocrites! "

Later, when school boy
-cannot say simple guy
-good grades; early teens
-curious and searching…

Students, as always were showcase
-we were sent to a gym; new made
-set to be inaugurated
-somebody of royals would be there
-I stood by a guard
-uniformed, soldiers stood firm

Statue, of stone in iron
-with a gun, motionless

"Why so fixed? " I questioned
- "…they too are human like ourselves…"
-this is how I talked, joked…
-with man in helmet and uniform

Time passed and ribbon cut
-toward home, I, on run
-suddenly kicks and fists
-and swears filled with lies
- "This bastard fingered girl…"

Was too young to do so
-had not done, was no girl…

I reached home
-bleeding and bruised

By then I could recall
-the cause of brutal
-police and behaviour…

Long after the time came
-I grew and became
-captain… officer
-also joined a college, Technical U-Tehran
-our team felt like stick…two heads shit
-one told me why rebels suspected
-when talking or shouting slogans
-some thought we, were spies and agents
-since we were in civil; no ranking…
-at same time, we did not tell police
-that we had higher ranks

With rebels at a door was slapped very hard
-earlobe turned purple and black
-for quite a long time

Police are powerful
-with our tax buy the tools
-on own wish and own will put in use
-official and legal

Even if poor victim
-did nothing is a poor innocent

Call this pig:
- "A legal gangster, criminal! ! ! "