Through Blackest Night Poem by Albert Ralph

THROUGH BLACKEST NIGHT
June? 1983

Through the depths of blackest night, I wandered.
Distant stars tried, but could not light the way.
While lightning flashed, and distant drums of thunder.
Falling stars became a fiery rain.
Eerie shadows danced by sky electric.
Marsh-light spectres hovered by the stream.
Craven wolves decried the pyrotechnic.
Within the din, I thought I heard a scream.

Piercing stingers, swarming, tried to drain,
The wine of life, blood from within my veins.
By my own power, I tried to dodge the rain.
Ha ha! They sang as they drank.

Within my mind, said a voice, “I can stop the pain.”
“Lay down your arms, come to me. Let me take the reins.”
“Just pay your tribute, your life in my hands and you’re free.”
But no!

The sword you gave me,
It’s hilt in my hand.
Your word that saved me,
It’s tongue of fire, stilled that liar.
This bridge can’t fall.
Your strength quells all.

1982


This seems as though I was going through a time of great doubt and depression. Separated, and raising two children. I had friends around me sure, but I didn’t always want to do the things that they were free to do. I had responsibilities.
It would have been easy to give up I suppose, I didn’t seem to have the strength myself to carry on. Voices, (thoughts) of doubt entered my mind, telling me to give up what I believe in. Just give up, and go the way of the world, but from within came the still small voice of God. Holding me up, giving me strength. Underneath are the everlasting arms.
You atheists and rationalists out there can say what you want. You say I merely believe. You say there is no proof of God outside of a believer’s mind, and that proof is not good enough for you. You say that belief is irrational, and illogical. Well you can keep your logic and your rations. I say, I don’t merely believe. I know. I have been lifted and supported too many times, when I needed it most, and sometimes when I didn’t realize I needed it. You say it’s all in my head. Well that just so happens to be where I live, in my head. Where do you live? What goes through your mind in the deep dark times of your life? Have you ever needed an internal hug, or do you use Scotch?

On a physical level, this song is merely about mosquitoes, yet on a deeper level, it was bout the demons that were being chased at the time.