Thoughts Of You Poem by Sandra Sando

When I open my eyes as the morning creeps in
Your smiling face beckons that my day must begin.
'Come on mum, ' you tell me, 'don't just lie there in bed'
'I know it's not easy, but I'm still with you - inside your head.'
It's alright for you son, to say that to me, but it's hard to be motivated day after day.
Do you know what it's like to try to go on, when the voice in my head just keeps saying 'he's gone.'

You have to admit, son, I've been very good.
It hasn't been easy and I never thought that I would.
I never did think that without you I'd cope,
But I have and I am, I just have to hope.
Hope that with time the heart starts to heal,
The days aren't so long and I can again start to feel.
Feelings of happiness, hope and of passion.
Being able to show, to others compassion.

It's only two years so it's still early days
Tho' it seems like forever since you went away.
Away I am sure to a far better place.
A place full of love, a place full of laughter,
A place where you'll be a handsome young man for ever after.
But for the time being, I must be content, to stay where I am
Until my life is spent.
One of these days tho', when God has decided,
My time will come and we'll be united.
When that day arrives I will hurry to meet you,
I know you'll be waiting, and when I greet you
My heart will be full, no, overflowing, overflowing with love,
All the love I've been storing.
Love for you my darling son,
Unconditional love from the day you were born.

Written after the loss of my son, Colin.