My Grandfather asked me
to come out to the barn
where we had some baby chickens
The barn had three stalls
and he asked
that I be down in the third stall
as soon as possible
I went and put on my rubber boots and walked to the barn
I walked through the dark
towards the light
and as I approached I could hear
the chicks
chirping
I swung open the wooden gate
and he stood there
The light bulbs
reflected in his glasses
He asked me if I thought I was a man
I didn’t know how to answer
“Not really” I said
“Well”, he said, “you sure like to talk like one.”
He took off his glasses
rolled the sleeves
of his mechanic uniform
to his elbows
and cracked his knuckles.
I stared at the chicks
They began to huddle together
and I felt like they sensed something
was about to happen
I did too
but I kept looking at them
watching him
from the corner of my eye
He undid his belt
and ripped it from around his waist,
wrapped the end of it one time around his hand
“Get over here” he said.
I moved closer
and looked down at the belt.
Then he smacked me with the other hand
and I went down to my knees.
He hit me with that belt
as I braced for each one
connecting with my back.
He stopped and I stood up
“Do you still think you are a man now? ” he said
“I never said I was.” I replied
I was leaning over the top of the chicks
and I picked one up and
threw it into the wall behind him
it fell to the floor
and flopped around.
He grabbed me by the back of my neck
and held me there
for what seemed
like days and the chicks chirped
and scattered around, frightened
and I could feel the blood trying to pump
through my constricted veins
My head was getting light
and still I stared at those chicks
Soon they would be grown
and I would cut all of their heads off
with a hatchet.
and we would eat chicken salad
everyday
I didn’t think I was a man
and never really thought about it
before then
But that night
I knew what it felt like
to be beat like one
That, I think, was what growing up
was all about
and I wore my bruises
like medals
of becoming a man.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Well written poem Jeffrey...passage of rites... brutal....thanks for sharing it