Show Mercy, My Dear Poem by Leria Hawkins

Show Mercy, My Dear
Date: July 27,2020

Man of my pain
Tis agonizing, the life suffered since our meeting
Your whispers have drowned the serenity of my nights
Dreams, now ragged memories worn on the sleeves of a tattered heart
Seasons have long blurred into a blinding snow of uncertainty
I, so weary of the fight I cannot win

Please, wear me no more at your disposal
Untie the strings, unbind me from this cruel delusion
Freedom, give me freedom to thrive, freedom to rise, to breathe once more
And wings, wings to fly far, far beyond reckless moments
Out to a place of stillness, a place to accept and forgive

I have loved vehemently and lost in this long bittersweet battle with your heart
Never was I the sunshine that makes your smile so very beautiful
Never, were my arms, the cozy blanket you needed to keep warm
Sadly, I have seared into your mind as a vision of something else
A diversion that feeds the demons you so carefully hide

So naïve, I gave in to your persuasion, was crippled by your favor
I found myself too weak to un-hear your whispers of fancy
I, so prone to forget at your slightest reassurance
Each time, smothering my torment in brief splashes of hope
Only to be deflated by the next cruel blow

Your whispers have become my sighs of torment
A hot edged blade that chars with every lightly spoken possibility
Your carelessly written songs plunge daggers deep into my soul
Each cruel verse a testament to this calamity
The destruction has broken me, my spirit, my sense of self-worth

Have your proclivities eaten away at your sense of civility
Do they run so deeps that you cannot turn away
Cannot lay down the blade that pierces my heart again and again
Am I destined forever as your victim, your prey
Your deep, dark, unspoken, unseen secret…

Will I forever lie cold and tormented behind the veil
A plaything, a dirty little secret sequestered in a tomb of silence
A name to never grace your lips, a heart tied forever to a stone
Hush-hush, my dear, ssshhhh, don't speak too loud
Else, you'll risk embarrassment to your kindred pride?

I have tried to forget you, my muse, my heart, my flaming passion
I have forsaken the venue used to bleed out the river of my sorrow
Stead, I've kept bottled and corked my personal heartbreak
Signed, sealed, and delivered to a den of dark despair
A ghost, to roam endlessly the hallways of my soul

Man of my pain
I've loved you for half a lifetime, unrequited
I've carried the torch, a flame to show you the way
But received only cool indifference in return
I could not find your place of softness or sincerity
My light could not dispel your long held beliefs

Release me from your snare, my sweet, wave no more your magic wand over my soul
Forget me, my name, when only spoken in silence
My image, if only the means to flame your most wicked desires
Banish me from your midnight dreams, as I have languished there far too long
Reject the whole of me as you have so easily rejected my heart

Please, whisper no more, allow those memories to fade
For as lost as I may be, I know that there is no future in our past
Leave me now to soul searching, to healing my troubled heart
Winter is just around the corner, dear, our seasons have passed
From here, I walk alone, to go peacefully into my sunset

If there was ever a moment in these many, many years
A brief thought that wasn't spurred by lewd intension
A second, a flash of truth in your many declarations
I ask only this, a promise, one to keep for all time
Promise…to think of me no more.

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All Rights Reserved, Copyright 2020_Leria Hawkins