Meeting On The Internet Poem by Randy McClave

I remember back to my younger age
When I didn't care where I worked, or my wage,
I called girls on the phone or I would send them a letter
But, meeting and talking to them in person, was so much better;
So, if you can…. Please send me a handwritten message.

Please, don't get so vexed!
Just because I keep sending you jpegs of sex,
I remember when we chatted on-line before we met
You told me that you would enjoy staying in my bed,
So, when you can.... Send me a text.

Now as I sit back and think
When you tweeted before you said that you enjoyed to drink,
And you also enjoyed playing games and watching sports
And you posted that you adored wearing your short, shorts;
When you get a chance.... Send me a link.

As now as I remember with great detail
You wrote me once that you were different than another female,
You would never get jealous and you would never shout
Especially when my friends and I would all go out,
If you can.... Send me an email.

More information about you I would like to compile,
To me, you seem strangely odd and quite hostile,
Though we have known each other for years, it is though curiously bizarre
That we have never met, so I wonder who you really are,
If you don't mind…. Please update your profile.

Once again, are you skinny or are you fat?
You wrote that you're a republican, but you read like a democrat,
You also posted that you're attractive lady and your name is Kim
But, could you be a guy and your name is really Tim,
Let us sit down…. And, have an online chat.

Once impatiently I waited for my phone to ring
I used it for talking and planning and for everyone and everything,
Now though it seems whenever I argue or whenever we fight
It is always while we are on a social media site,
So, when you can.... Please send me a ping.

I once sat down and I circled personal ads in the local gazette
Then I would watch the local sports on my television set,
To meet or talk to women I would just step out my front door
But, that was the time of the past, no one does that anymore,
Now, we just turn on.... The internet.

Randy L. McClave