Man in the sand
wearing a cloak
rags and scrap cloth
seethed as he choked
on tears of anguish
on the thick, dark smoke
coming from home
to me, wind spoke
of a terrible crime
of broken dreams
of mothers' cries
and children's screams
of families, gone
for what it seems
pure suffering
what hatred brings
Man in the sand
a dark cloud loomed
the sky was ablaze
and the thunder boomed
Alone and in pain
he knew what he'd do
revenge must be had
yet he had no clue
for dark times came
as night and day
and try as he might
still would he stray
from the path he followed
so he kneeled to pray
to promise the world
those who did this, would pay
He found not the men
who kidnapped his wife
not a trace of the ones
who took his son's life
Not a dropp of rainwater
or a mere hunting knife
to fight for survival
to end civil strife
But on his last leg
exhausted and weak
he took his last breath
and fell off his feet
for this moral blight
was too tough to beat
Man in the sand
may you now rest in peace
Quite mature n strong hand...the narrative, the images, the rhyming effect n the lexical choice , , , everything is carefully managed...your confidence about this poem is right...
Nice poem written from deep thought. The poem brings to fore vividly the consequences of war. Thanks for sharing
While taking revenge we can sometimes lose our footing or waste our lives.
very very fine one, thanks, Man of sand may you now rest in peace, I like it O William Blake Beckett. I invite you to read my poems and comment.
Nice poem. Liked the flow. A tragic lesson about life. “Pure suffering, what hatred brings, ” agree with the statement.
This poem has a nice cadence. Its title, Man in the Sand, is memorable in its own right, and it also caused me to want to read the poem in the first place. It was nice of you to give this subject attention by way of your poem so that the rest of us can reflect on it. Thank you.
Not a drop of rainwater or a mere hunting knife to fight for survival to end civil strife I am thinking you are speaking to the larger injustice of crimes committed against a populace in general using this man's family as an example. Will a mere hunting knife end civil strife? Interesting line thought.
Great poem from a young man. So well written. Wish you the best.
this is amazing..the way you describe the way people are mad to take revenge.liked it.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
could be homeless man wandering the desert...casualty of war