I Have Grown Confident And Happy In Old Age (A Poem For Rosh Chodesh Kislev 5766) Poem by Shalom Freedman

In my old age
I suddenly grow confident
I have lived through so much uncertainty
Seen so much injustice and suffering
That I know
Real confidence is absurd
But nonetheless something in me
Perhaps experience
Perhaps having weathered many rough times
Perhaps being so well for my age
Perhaps understanding that lack of confidence
Gives so little and takes so much
Perhaps the love I have from a few
Perhaps the years of writing
And having lived for what I most care about
Perhaps Israel now
Perhaps so much beauty in the world
Perhaps so many good people I have known
And the gratitude I feel for all of them
Perhaps the many losses and the understanding
That I too will be a ‘loss’
Perhaps so much I don’t understand
But for this moment
For this now
Which may last moments only
I have grown confident and happy in old age-

May there be a good month for all of us
And a better world for humanity
We need it.