How I Wish Poem by Sandesh Paudyal

How I wish, all these were just a dream
That she would wake up and wish us the best
But alas! Rooted to bed is she, motionless
Putting all our wishes to rest

How I wish, she scolds me to the fire
For I keep on running astray
But there she lies, gasping for breath, choking, tears
Teary is she that once royal blue has turned to grey

How I wish, she beats me to hell
For all those silence, indifference and quiet
The bones and muscles no longer hers, no raised hands
Even though foxes play in the day and start running riot

How I wish, she teaches me, to fight for her
Confront anyone with hint of foul
But with odds heavily stacked against, she gazes on
Cursing herself allover, none to stand for her wide and tall

How I wish she hugs me tight
Tell me that she needs me, loves me, miss me and care
But there she lies so rugged, distorted and traumatized
"stay with me" she quells all within her but to say, she cannot dare

How I wish, she deserts me for a while
No roof, no name, no stars I would certainly prey for her
But there she lies, so ditched but still
She would herself freeze in cold, but we get the fur