Badminton Poem by pauline miller

Have you seen those country women
Cheeks plumped out from nibble packets
Sporting shorts above the knee
While they wave badminton rackets?

Bosoms leap from left to right
Derrieres bounce in merriment
Chicken wings swinging from their arms
As rackets flail with discontent.

sweat rolls down their rosy faces
spilling salt into their eyes
dumpling hands reach up to catch it
Then to wipe on thunderous thighs.

Huffed and puffed from puckered lips
Clouds of vapour fill the air
As they leap with expectation
Showing all their underwear.

And have you noticed all around
The benches filled with gentlemen?
Come they do from fields afar
Down the hills into the glen.

Legs stretched out now, quite relaxed
Panama's tilted at jaunty position
Arms folded and ready with eyes on court
For these are men with a mission.

These ladies of girth very well know
The audience focused on them
So they stretch, bend and heave with a duck and a weave
Each thinking that she is the gem.

They turn and they flutter their yearning eyes
And pitter and patter on elephants feet
And the benches twitter from many a sitter
Knowing they're in for a treat.

Now you my dear reader, may think this is not nice
To speak of our cousins this way
But let me tell you a small thing or two
It's precision timed this strutting display.

It's game set and matched on court and on bench
And mingling goes on with martinis
Then to the fangdango and tango they let themselves go
Then race off in their Lamborghinis.