After Low Poem by n. j. saroff

What happens next is an after low
Some people get an after glow
A sort of high a renewed will to stay alive, or to survive
After the energy has left
I lose my pep
I fall down
My depression sea drowns
My heart
Pulls me apart
like a drug I'm addicted to the moment before
Keep running back for more
Then I'll run away
Because I got problems I put off for another day
That sensation of its over and ending
Wishing I could just break and not keep bending
The world moves slow
And I'm trapped in a feeling of low
There is no escape or exit
The lights of my mind are dim lit
Everything is hollow and lonely
There is nothing left of me
What's going on in my head
I feel like I'm suffocating in blankets of my bed
I didn't leave it it just ended its over
Because I crave the past moments of joy I can never be sober
I don't need to drink or smoke
When I'm on the stage I don't feel nervous or like I might choke
Its just what happens after
I'm put in such a damper
Floating in the ocean on a raft
Is that depression or just a draft
In the air
I don't think I even care
It's a low
No one knows
I mask it with a smile and a pleasant attitude
So people don't know my saddening mood
Its an after low, you say no
Don't feel the way you do
If only you knew
I cant control the way I feel
I keep replaying the happy moments trying to make them real
But its gone
Like a band with a one hit one wonder song
I wish I could prove myself wrong
And pick myself up and let the sadness go but I cant
What a stupid rant
Once everything is done
Others will be filled with satisfaction like a contest they have won
But me
I watch that energy
As it leaves every part of my soul
Suddenly I'm dull void and null
The moment of okay has taken its toll
Some people get an after high
While I just want to die
I'm in an after low
And you you look so good in your after glow.