Michael Philips


Michael Philips Poems

1. Mid-Air Mattress 2/3/2006
2. Song Of Burma 4/11/2005
3. The Woman With The Woodpecker Laugh 5/19/2006
4. Photocopy Of Guernica 8/9/2006
5. Crossing State Lines 8/25/2006
6. A Proverb Of Evolution 9/25/2006
7. Directions For Navigating An Art Opening 7/6/2007
8. Melody The Comptroller 1/22/2008
9. The Oh So Pleasant Dick From The Neighborhood Association 8/12/2008
10. So Very Sorry For The Family 12/3/2008
11. How To Create The Perfect Poem 3/17/2008
12. My Munch’s Scream Experience 10/10/2006
13. Forgetting About John Fahey 4/10/2006
14. Yakinohara Marriage 7/13/2005
15. Eulogy Instructions 8/11/2005
16. Not Guilty 1/22/2005
17. Reversal 4/8/2005
18. Adios Suburbs, Hola Suburbs 7/6/2007
19. Car Wreck On The Old Coast Road 10/11/2006
20. Paul Klee Drops By 3/7/2005
21. Song Of The Peeping Tom 1/12/2005
22. Prank 1/6/2005
23. Quitting 3/4/2005
24. Bee Sting 3/20/2005
25. Julie’s Excommunication 3/1/2005
26. The Idiot's Funeral 8/17/2005
27. Prepare For Landing 6/30/2005
28. Evolutionary Chart 7/14/2005
29. Long Term Care 8/22/2006
30. Conquistadors 3/28/2006
31. Don’t Be Cruel 12/10/2005
32. The Absence Of Black 4/20/2005
33. I’ll Still Be Dead 8/9/2005
34. Instructions For Cheerleaders 10/3/2005
35. Confession To Frank Zappa 5/9/2005
36. Rebirth 5/23/2005
37. Shostakovich In Nebraska 9/13/2005
38. City Planning 2/22/2005
39. Tango Stupido 4/12/2006
40. A Special Daughter 5/26/2006
Best Poem of Michael Philips

Bad Art

I set off a stink bomb
At the art opening of bad art.
It was funny how everyone started
Looking around as if they
Would somehow be able to see the smell.
People began fanning their faces
With their programs and an Asian
Woman actually held her nose.
When they discovered I was the culprit
They roughly escorted me out
Of the gallery and the owner told me what I
Did was adolescent and stupid.
I said the smell was only bad
In his subjective mind – who’s to say what’s
A good smell and what’s a bad smell? But
He had already gone
Back inside to help ...

Read the full of Bad Art

The One True Religion

I.
Researchers say Mormons have continued
to posthumously baptize Jewish Holocaust victims
into their faith despite a promise to discontinue the practice

II.
Members who write letters seeking to resign
will be contacted by church leaders to make sure
they're not being pressured, and that they understand

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