Sea Lions Poem by Sebastian Seal

Sea lions are not like seals, the fools,
They have articulated flippers,
Go to private boarding schools,
And wear expensive slippers.

Educated, upper-class artisans?
With poise and grace and balance?
Scented with fragrant tisane?
Those poncy-woncy miscreants!

Sea lions are so snooty,
They are smooth and trim,
And none of them are cutey,
Because they're all too slim.

Well-bred, charming, superior?
Suave, brave, muscles of iron?
Hydrodynamic posterior?
Those poncy-woncy sea-lions!

Sea lions get up my nose.
They show off to crowds,
They prance about and pose.
They're far too pompously proud.

Energetic, skillful acrobats?
Leaping through burning hoops?
Juggling dogs and cats?
Those poncy-woncy nincompoops!

I'm not saying they're stercoricolous,
Don't get me wrong,
I'm not at all jealous.
I just think that they pong.