Real Ocd Poem by Cary Rodgers

Butterfly's in my belly when i wake up. I fell sick Why? Because my mind is not normal the OCD gets bad at times.I play my games to try to put my mind at work so i don't worry.But i have to stop some time.I open the bible and flip though seeing nothing that jumps out.Close it felling just as lost as when i opened it.Its sad that the things that hurt me are what take this feeling away. I can drink it gone but at what cost. I have drink heavy this week and I'm in a catch 22. I drink to make me feel numb the wake up an feel bad about drinking and the worries start so i drink again.8 days it has been like this. What i would do to be normal worried free. Where i didn't wake up feeling sick. Where i could sit still with out fear of a panic attack.I hear people all the time say they have OCD. It makes me mad its used so lightly when they don't know how bad it really is. I'm sorry you liking your books in A.B.C order is Not OCD. OCD is where you sleep just so you don't have to think.When you just feel Nervous and you don't know why. Tell me how do you stop warring when you don't even know what your warring about? I have even worried about all my warring it may seem funny and most don't understand. Because what i deal with you cant see but is so very very real. And i know these are just lost words that will never be read or cared about. But like my worries these words are now here to stay written as i fight the butterfly's and try to slow my mind.