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Suicidal Happiness

Rookie (The graves in my mind)

Poem From The Eleven Year Old Self


Let's swim out past the borders and watch the world die
Suffocate in misery and forever question why
When angels deserve to die and we both fell from heaven
But we hit the world to hard and know we are the burden
Sweet hatred of mine takes me away from the blood
I don't even care, my heart has no love
Mother is swing from a hell written noose
But I never liked my mother so I had nothing to loose
Skipping ropes that are now child play
Choke the little girl to death so she must stay
Ring around the roses there is murders next door
I used to cry every night but I don't any more
I'm alone in my room because I have done wrong
Been stuck in this pain and hearing voices for so long
Daddy is so far away and he must not want me
I will promise to be what my mummy wanted me to be
But I want to be like The Manson Family that Daddy told me about
At 10 years old I lost my childhood and the teenage angst is something I could do without
So I hear people running into my room
I have a nervous feeling that something bad is going to happen soon
I'm going to be the girl hanging from the ceiling and swing dead
Please tell them to stop, all the voices in my head
I want mummy back but as she is everything I hate.
The shrinks try to save me but it's too late
I made a promise to Satan to visit him first
And a faithful Christian I'm not I am the worst
Regrets and quilt but I refuse to break down and cry
My name is Ash-Lee and I'm eleven years old and I want to die

Submitted: Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Edited: Saturday, August 17, 2013
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Poet's Notes about The Poem

This is a poem I found clean the other day
I wrote this when I was eleven years of age
I didnt change it execpt some serious spelling mistakes :)
I was so surprised that I was thinking like this so young, guess some things never change :)
I hope that you like it

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