No Air Poem by Alex Cairnie

I read about it on the web, it took me by surprise
I thought I knew the reasons why, I felt my heartbeat rise
I cannot wait to leave this place, and feel the slow release
I think I'll try again today, try to make the voices cease

I never ever questioned why, these thought's have haunted me
I never knew my card was marked, it was given to me free
I can't control this awful urge, to climb the stairs again
I don, t know why or how or when, I cannot tell you when

I smile because you ask me too, you won't hear me complain
I say I'm happy just because, you'll think that I am sane
I cannot tell you how I feel, so please don't feel too sad
I cannot take much more of this, too much is what I've had

I will not leave a letter, that explains why I am gone
I will not tell you who's too blame, you'll just say I am wrong
I never want to see you cry, so please try hard to laugh
I hope that you can realise, you were my better half

I feel at ease my senses clear, the best I've felt in years
I feel a sort of happiness, no need for any tears
I feel that you are with me here, no last regrets from me
I feel the pressure letting go, in a moment I'll be free

I hope you never judge me for, the mess I left behind
I hope in time you learn to love, I pray some peace you find
I hope we meet another day, when many years have past
I hope you can forgive me then, you were my first and last

I have no fear of dying, my mind will be at ease
I asked myself a million times, so understand me please
I cannot find the peace on earth, that others do so well
I searched for it in every place, and all I found was hell

I found a way to happiness, the only way I knew
I took the steps myself alone, it's what I had to do
I placed myself inside your shoes, but couldn't last a mile
I walked toward the light I saw, at last I learned to smile

AC