Missing The Ten Fifteen Poem by Janice Windle
Missing The Ten Fifteen
A middle-aged Venus
I rise from the depths
of the Northern Line
out under the canopy
stretched above
under the night sky.
Everybody meeting at Waterloo
flushing, rushing
to where the orange letters
on the Departures board
shuffle, shudder and shake off
their promises. The ten-fifteen
has vanished from the board
no longer on the cards.
The race for home lost
I wander aimless through crowds
their faces upturned, anxious
like nestlings denied their nests.
Is this poem a little more complex than it first appears? - 'middle-aged venus' (what a title! What has she been up to? !) 'shuffle, shudder and shake off/ their promises' (shhhh! - we'll say no more!) - well crafted and full of intrigue (or perhaps my mind's working overtime!) S ;)
This reminds me of frustrating public transport (I think yours is a train) . The words - shuffle, rushing, shudder and take off work brilliantly. The feeling of hopelessness permeates in the latter part of the poem and I can relate to this so well! 10 Karin Anderson
Unique, rich and gorgeous imagery here. Of course the middle-aged Venus rising from the depths of the Northern Line out under the canopy....is unforgettable, very powerful image - the undoubted accent in my humble opinion. I love it!
Janice, I've only just discovered you after seeing your name on someone else's favourites list. This was the poem I started with - and I love it. So many terrific images. I particularly liked - 'where the orange letters on the Departures board shuffle, shudder and shake off their promises'. No time at the moment, but I'll do some more exploring and definitely check out your new stuff as you post it.
what a snapshot...5 megapix their faces upturned, anxious like nestlings denied their nests. beautiful cheers
The first three lines would make a superb (if slightly informal) haiku. It is a splendid image.
This is certainly a unique vision, a singular way of looking at the everyday things in our lives. You have a rare gift, and I admire the poet who can bring a such fresh encounter of our world! You also have a good ear, shown by the consonance in 'shuffle, shudder and shake off' and the pure echoing sound in 'flushing, rushing, ' but some of my favorite lines are '.....through crowds their faces upturned, anxious like nestlings denied their nests.'
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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5/4/2024 8:24:27 PM # 1.0.0.1119
An very ordinary slice of life beautifully depicted and finished with a perfect feathered cadence. Your 'middle aged Venus' adds a self-deprecatory touch and the whole poem leaves the reader nodded his/her head in rueful understanding. Love, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥