Missing The Ten Fifteen Poem by Janice Windle

Missing The Ten Fifteen

Rating: 5.0


A middle-aged Venus
I rise from the depths
of the Northern Line
out under the canopy
stretched above
under the night sky.
Everybody meeting at Waterloo
flushing, rushing
to where the orange letters
on the Departures board
shuffle, shudder and shake off
their promises. The ten-fifteen
has vanished from the board
no longer on the cards.
The race for home lost
I wander aimless through crowds
their faces upturned, anxious
like nestlings denied their nests.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Alison Cassidy 20 June 2009

An very ordinary slice of life beautifully depicted and finished with a perfect feathered cadence. Your 'middle aged Venus' adds a self-deprecatory touch and the whole poem leaves the reader nodded his/her head in rueful understanding. Love, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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Susan Jarvis 25 June 2009

Is this poem a little more complex than it first appears? - 'middle-aged venus' (what a title! What has she been up to? !) 'shuffle, shudder and shake off/ their promises' (shhhh! - we'll say no more!) - well crafted and full of intrigue (or perhaps my mind's working overtime!) S ;)

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This reminds me of frustrating public transport (I think yours is a train) . The words - shuffle, rushing, shudder and take off work brilliantly. The feeling of hopelessness permeates in the latter part of the poem and I can relate to this so well! 10 Karin Anderson

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Onelia Avelar 08 July 2009

Unique, rich and gorgeous imagery here. Of course the middle-aged Venus rising from the depths of the Northern Line out under the canopy....is unforgettable, very powerful image - the undoubted accent in my humble opinion. I love it!

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Sally Carter 02 July 2009

Janice, I've only just discovered you after seeing your name on someone else's favourites list. This was the poem I started with - and I love it. So many terrific images. I particularly liked - 'where the orange letters on the Departures board shuffle, shudder and shake off their promises'. No time at the moment, but I'll do some more exploring and definitely check out your new stuff as you post it.

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Saadat Tahir 29 June 2009

what a snapshot...5 megapix their faces upturned, anxious like nestlings denied their nests. beautiful cheers

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Paul Hansford 29 June 2009

The first three lines would make a superb (if slightly informal) haiku. It is a splendid image.

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Lillian Thomas 27 June 2009

This is certainly a unique vision, a singular way of looking at the everyday things in our lives. You have a rare gift, and I admire the poet who can bring a such fresh encounter of our world! You also have a good ear, shown by the consonance in 'shuffle, shudder and shake off' and the pure echoing sound in 'flushing, rushing, ' but some of my favorite lines are '.....through crowds their faces upturned, anxious like nestlings denied their nests.'

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