Mind Flooded Poem by pump princess

Mind Flooded



Mind flooded with memories
Spilling over now
Onto the page
Ciphering through this very pen.
My fear had dissipated in such short time
So I disregarded the private number’s suggestion
And did not move to higher ground.
I’m stubborn
Always have been…
Stubborn enough to ignore the damage
And return to the house we’d built;
The house that has yet to become a home.
They’d called me persistent;
Damned fools
Thinking I was repairing the damage,
When I was only covering it up…
The water’s rising again
Pulling layer by layer of paint from the walls.
A drowning pool of color forms before me
Mimicking the rainbow I’d thought I’d seen before—
Before-when I had been convinced the storm had come and gone…
I was wrong…
And now my shame only feeds the fire
Fueling the mockery,
provoking the hateful game
encouraging as a siblings’ laughter is to the child lacking discipline.
As the mockery continues,
Another torrent of nostalgia rushes in.
Pigments are stripped away
Exposing an ironically cheerful palette of pastels.
So here I sit
Staring at the pew before me...
A service is being held
And I only want to see because I can’t…
I can’t see past the Easter bonnet the past wears atop her hateful head.
I feel as if it’s Christmas again
Outside the snow is falling
Beckoning me to dance among the crystal ornaments that fall from the sky…
But the phone is ringing—
A siren-
Whose song I can’t yet resist.

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