Invisible Disabilty Poem by Brenda Weemes

In a body that feels not of my own
A stranger, I touch but I do not feel
It betrays me, it teases and taunts and intimidates me.

A part that leaves me in pain
Not just for a little while but
Each little moment, of my waking
And every nigh

Its invisible, it cant be seen.
My mind tells me one thing
My body tells me another.
A prison within myself

I yearn to be like each person I see
But Chronic pain.. and my body
Betrays those dreams.

Birth.. is a miracle
But a baby without a flaw is a bigger miracle
Missing limbs, extra limbs, conjoined twins and invisible deformaties
Potters syndrome, Downs Syndrome, .. anything can go wrong.

One part of my spine.. the nerve sac is twisted and intertwined in the lower lumbar
That is malformed, not normal all from a single birth, something went wrong.
Part of me feels.. part of me is dead or dying..
Numb, pain, uncertainty

And in the end wheels will replace my walking ability
This and much makes me wish I could just scream for it to leave me..
And others, I paste a smile and pretend all is fine with me
But you see.. this is me I have an invisible disability

By Brenda (Cloud)
Cauda Equina Syndrome and Chronic Pain Victim.