If I Were A Sex Toy Poem by Ramona Thompson

Erotic parody of Beyonce's new hit, If I Were A Boy

If I were a sex toy
Even just for a day
I would't just hump her in the morning
and throw her out after I got what I wanted, no

Drink deeply from the gay guys
and go down on bicurious girls
I'd stick to whoever I wanted
and I'd never get confronted for it
Cause I would be doing only what they expected of me

If I were a sex toy
I think I'd like to understand
How it feels to lube up a curious virgin girl
I swear I'd better than any man
I'd easy and pleasy inser myself into her
Cause I know how it sucks
When you lose it to the one you wanted
Only to find yourself disappointed
Cos she took hers, but never gave you yours
Left all your romantic hopes and dreams destoryed

If I were a sex toy
I would't beat her like a drum
Leaving her sobbing and broken
Vowing never to be again with a lover alone

I'd put her pleasure first
and let make up the rules as we go
Cause I know her orgasms would be plentiful
Everytime we ran it on in
Around the bases to home, to home

If I were a sex toy
I think I'd like to understand
How it feels to lube up a curious virgin girl
I swear I'd better than any man
I'd easy and pleasy inser myself into her
Cause I know how it sucks
When you lose it to the one you wanted
Only to find yourself disappointed
Cos she took hers, but never gave you yours
Left all your romantic hopes and dreams destoryed

It's a little too late for you to give me my cherry back
Say you made a clumsy first timer's mistake
Think that I'll ever let you come back to hit that
If you thought that again I would give it up to you
You thought wrong

But you're just a sex toy
You're not even made to understand,
and you're not even made to understand
How it feels to lube up a curious virgin girl
Someday you wish you could be better than a man
You don't stick it to her right
You don't care if it hurts
As long as you get what you wanted
You don't care if you leave her disappointed
All her romantic hopes and dreams destoryed

But you're just a sex toy

2008 Ramona Thompson