I Haven'T A Clue Poem by Julia West (julesx 64)

I am a child held within Gods Grace
Most the time I have a smile upon my face.
But deep seated down within me, you see
There are pains hidden from view, from you
Sharp emptiness and longing inside its true
But for what exactly – I haven’t a clue

I know my loss is childless bound now,
Of a marriage past, that didn’t last
Past ‘Loves’ that gained my 100% trust
Only to throw and stamp on my heart quivering there in the dust…
Memories of harsh words told on my ears so true
Why such pain? I haven’t a clue ….

A man thought he would send me from this world of mine
A strangle hold, my breath escaping, a sense of peace – not fear
Propelled towards the arms of God I was aiming – it was clear
My heart of love is big and bold and always giving
My angels saw fit to intercede – and ensure I stayed living
What purpose is mine? I haven’t a clue ….

People say I am an angel as helpful am I,
Burdens are shared and secrets are told,
For shoulders have I that carry and hold
Encourage and love with my whole body and soul
Yet my own children I did not get to keep and hold
A woman, defective is she ….
Why this burden – I haven’t a clue?