Hemorrhoids Poem by Ron Hopkins

I used to laugh at hemorrhoids, and talk of them in fun
But that all ended yesterday, when I developed one
My disposition is no longer sunny
And I think I walk a little funny
It burns, it itches, it needs attention
But you dare not scratch, what you dare not mention
Hoping to stave off a doctors appointment
I bought me some lotion, a salve and an ointment
Applied them all gently, with q-tip and cotton
And I hope by tomorrow, it's gone and forgotten