Daily Ads And Gossips Poem by Patti Masterman

Friable Macintosh's for sale here
Right by the powdered milk
Of Shakestonian ruminants herding
Notwithstanding extinct status

Portable Portnoy habitats
Otherwise called port-a-potties
Delivered Cod or gratis
For pink-pantied Hotten-totties

Biscadelian porcelain thrones
Are not for the impoverished
And there's water poof jelly-phones
For mermaids in their grottos

Once I groped a groper
Where the groupers like to feed
Never grope a day-glo grouper
Where a pedo's gone to seed

Never stroke an offshore derrick
With a short broken piece of pipe
Or sing to a pipe organ Herrick
Where the boys are hunting snipe

Never chew a chaw of tobacco
On Tobacco road; there's a curse
Of a rat gnaws by light of day-
Or even dark, in a hearse.