Congratulations, Morley Poem by Charles Chaim Wax

I said as soon as he entered the Teacher’s Center.
“Bernstein, you remembered.”
“A man’s 20th wedding anniversary
doesn’t happen every day.”
When I said that Ida Rice
hopped up from her chair
and joined us at the couch. “Congratulations, Morley, ” she said.
“Thank you, thank you, my friends,
my dear precious friends.”
Tears flooded his eyes
and streamed down his cheeks.
“What’s the secret? ” asked Ida.
Quickly composing himself
he said, “We love each other.”
“Love! I’m sick of that word
I’ve loved countless times
Where’d it get me? Do you see
a ring on my finger? Now damn it, tell me.”
Morley stared at her
as Ida’s sad love affairs were well known
didn’t hide them
indeed the woman felt compelled
to recount the events
in almost embarrassing detail
especially the objects
used to penetrate her
secret site of passion
like Ritz crackers
used by three of her lovers
one in Italy
and two in merry old England
all members of some demented cult
as far as I was concerned
yet I could never figure out
why happiness eluded her:
an attractive woman
intelligent
and with a fine sense of humor.
But her twin sister
also remained unmarried
so perhaps simply the Fate of her family.
“The secret? ” said Morley,
“here you have it:
I do whatever my dear wife instructs.”
“I did that, ” said Ida. “Where’d it get me?
Do you see a ring on my finger?
now tell me, damn you,
my life’s almost over
and I don’t want to die alone.
Morley said somberly,
“I keep nothing back
Isn’t that correct, Bernstein? ”
I smiled saying,
“The man spills his guts
every chance he gets
that’s a fact.”
So once more he repeated his secret:
“I do whatever my dear wife instructs...”
“YOU SAID THAT BEFORE, ”
protested Ida.
“...without so much as a hiss, tweet, or peep. Did I put that in? ”