Carnival I - Funhouse Poem by Lori Boulard
Carnival I - Funhouse
Bright lights among mirrors
reflections in caricature
curiosity surrounds
innocence.
She turns a corner and sees herself
wide
wavy
tall
small.
Each distortion extreme
yet strangely familiar.
Wandering into the open,
embraced by reality
she is haunted by the notion
of something left
behind.
Haven't been in a funhouse for...50 years...but this is it, all right-Alice! And what you leave us with is fascinating. It's true, that whatEVER experience my mind and senses go through, they seem to take, for a time, as 'me'. Even if it's a gross distortion. You make the point well.
Lori...I really like this poem. The situation is interesting and I think you make good poetry out of it. My reservation, however, is modifying the way the words would ordinarily be used in the middle of the poem. Though it works on the surface, it is a distraction that breaks the spell of the poem. My first thought is, 'She's doing something with the words here, ' and I am no longer in the poem, and I have to start again. I would simply put the adjectives into sentences without drawing attention to them. Otherwise, a fine poem.
As good as the other one Lori, this is also going to my favourites. Great write. Love Ernestine XXX
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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4/28/2024 5:04:12 AM # 1.0.0.1119
Beautifully constructed celebration of imagination and possibilities. Robert