Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth Poem by Dequan Nicholas

I opened up the book
Gave it a look
From a standstill gave a page a shook
Began to read and remembered what it took
Happiness inside a slave
Freedom relinquished spending with nothing saved
Jesus will I ever be saved
Looking at the page seeing all the verses my existence contradicts
That I am a Flagrant sinner this much I admit
Yet sin to whose standards who can justify
What may be an illusion the greatest of all lies
Looking in the mirror seeing what I despise
With what does a confused soul comprise
An entity searching for individuality subversively
Abandoning everything I loved including family
I am accountable no Satan or apple to pin blame
My choices are the reasons for my shame
remembering all these things I began to shook
My hand trembling as I opened the book