Augh Poem by Amber Mull

Augh

Rating: 3.0


you tell me that i hvae to change
to leave my ways and stop this shame
for it i dont you say ill DIE? ? ?
youll blab it all and show my crime
youll push me down
and watch me fall
instead of letting me try my all
i know my wrongs and my rights
when i should and should not fight
but its harder then you know
it slowy eats away your soul
im used abused hurt and torn
you expect me to heal and be reborn again
been there done that
its all the same
but what they do dosent fill the pain
dosent close to void
nor cover my past
its something i have to live with now
just do me a favour
and dont put me down
the jokes they hurt
taking a shot at my heart
your suposed to be there
im filled with words i cant express
there just a big ol jumbled mess

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Bryan Alexander 23 September 2009

I'm all for constructive criticism but I think the man below me missed the point. It is all about the message and conveying a story or sense of feeling. I liked this one a lot

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Greenwolfe 1962 03 July 2008

The feeling here is strong and it comes through this very rough going read. I can't recommend it as it is now, it just has too many errors in the writing. That's sad because I think the message is important. GW62

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