Am I Too Big For A Life? Poem by rinki nandy

I grew up knowing i am different and i am special,
i grew up paying rent and to strive is my battle.

I was the best after a long time,
talk of the world by the age i was nine,
talent, fame, glory were all mine,
my only control was my food when i would dine.

I knew no friends, a child was denied,
before i knew my soul had died,
a man barred me from calling him dad,
which hurt me real bad,
if only he knew what i never had.

Life of a star was what i led,
the tabloids factory was what i fed,
found out from what i read,
some said i should be dead.

They call them devoted fans, say i drive them crazy,
said a hateful bone was what i was sans, found them accusations very sleazy.
I pulled myself up from the mess,
hoped to live a life my haters could never guess.
I married twice for love and children,
as to me God existed in only children,
they refused..failed to comprehend my love for them,
as to them i could love only my children.

I was recognized world over,
i broke all the records over and over,
feared the day my youth will be over.

I loved art and always will, it attracted me with a huge force,
gave me peace.....which they never will, where i found solace.
No matter how hard i tried to clarify all the doubts,
they never got around or tried to simplify their routes.

Was lost and abandoned in my fame,
the person i am and was shy, they only knew my name,
mercifully i looked up at the sky as they played their dirty game.

I was a huge star, music and art were never far,
wish i could get away from evil and remain the greatest star.
World waited as there was to be a comeback,
surprised them who thought i ain't ever getting back,
prepared myself to get it all back,
deserved this world no lack.

I was denied my last wish....if i lived few more days,
and showed the world what they wish.
My legacy can not die with me,
my talent can not lie with me.
I am close to God and happy today,
I've found so much peace in one day,
talking to God by the sun light's ray,
gone are the lonely and sad days,
i would like to live forever this way.
When i look back at my life,
find name, fame, talent, betrayal, loneliness and love were all so rife,
i can't help but ask God......“am i too big for a life? ”.

Note: the subject “I” is Michael Jackson, i have tried to imagine how he felt during those days and how he feels now being far away.