Kill or Be killed

It's sad when death feels like a fun release,
It's sad when people stop trying to talk you out of it,
It's sad when you look around and all you see is misery,
...

Disease,
pregnacy,
judgement,
...

I hate her.
That's what i say,
I loved him.
That's what I feel.
...

Why are they talkin about me?
They don't know what they're talking about,
I'm not sick,
I don't understand.
...

Why is everything so hard?

Why do I wanna commit suicide,
Why do I cry every morning and night,
...

Fun,
Whens the last time I had that,
Fun,
Something I just can't remember,
...

Thanks to my brothers who do nothing but look out for me,
Thanks to my dad whos done all he can for me,
Thanks to my grandmother who raised me,
And,
...

Everything I believed in gone,
Everyone I believed in went away,

WHY WON'T ANYTHING STAY!
...

I wanna feel it,
I wanna forget about it,
I wanna forget hearing my mom talk about it,
...

I feel like lifes a disease.
It's spreading on me like cancer,

I fear that it might catch up with me.
...