Ashley Proulx

Getting over a broken heart is like mourning the death of a loved one; only what has died is the beating in your chest and the warmth that held you tight.
When love starts to wither and fade you can’t help but to sense is.
When the love has died your lovers eyes grow cold and dim, lifeless and it feels as if your looking right into the eyes of a corpse,
You see emptiness, you feel numb and burning pain all at once.
...

A chapter has ended, finally after so much torment had been endured,
A new chapter has opened but it’s still in the works,
So far it’s been a great new beginning.
Life works in a lot of different ways, throwing things at you that left you unprepared but none the less the inevitable is not the end but a change in direction.
...

At times you feel pain so strongly it rips you apart in ways you never thought possible.
All you wanted was to be loved
All you ever longed for was someone to hold you tight through these long lonely nights.
No matter how hard you try, how much you keep believing you wonder if there really is anyone out there who truly cares.
...

I may seem blind to the dangers this life throws at us all but I know they exist and I can see the rise and falls.
I was born with a gift greater than the dangers that are bestowed upon us.
I see all before it happens, my instincts are strong and my intuition runs deep.
This world is an ugly place and at times I cannot find the point to living in it but I try to see the beauty and I know goodness and purity still exist and because of that I am still here.
...

When the storm clouds lift and all anger has been washed away, all that is left is the memories that linger through out the days and when the night falls dreams are no longer tainted but are bittersweet with every kiss that fails to turn into reality.
The pain is still there, the longing to be back in your arms will never go away.
Lonely heartfelt goodbyes but our souls will never die.
I want to hold you so tightly sometimes but I know that will never happen for this is goodbye.
...

You took it all, you could never fall,
You broke my heart you tore it apart.
Your empty promises your false compromises you kept me hanging on by a little thread of hope.
Was is worth seeing me suffer, hearing my screams while dreaming, feeling the tears that were falling drowning out my long lonely nights.
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A name, my name, one I thought I would never go by again.
A marriage a divorce, the pain and anger.
I’m so glad to call myself by my name once again.
It’s a step backwards but a start in a new direction.
...

When I close my eyes I see you by my side and everything is alright.
You hold me tight, you love me.
You show me you care and how much you need me, how much you want me.
My entire life I lived so simply believing I had something that was so far away.
...

The tears I’ve cried for you have turned to dust,
The heart that once beated to the same rhythm of yours has been crushed.
Mistakes I’ve made resurface from the past and the blame is put on me.
I am no longer afraid to say it wasn’t all my fault, it was yours.
...

Some days I feel unbreakable, other days I shatter like fallen glass.
These feelings are unmistakable but the past is in the past or so they say.
My emotions keep changing and doubts are racing, cluttering my once clear way of thinking,
How do I know for sure that I have moved on
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Your name vanishes from my lips and I no longer feel your touch upon my skin.
It’s been over a long time and I will never go back.
The pain you caused cut me much too deep, nearly putting me in an early grave,
Fortunately I escaped.
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Can I believe the words that are spoken,
So gently your love has been approaching.
Can I believe what I feel is real with each kiss so filled with passion.
Can I help my heart to stop aching each time He is not around,
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I cannot hide what I deny, the only lie you will find is said only to cover the scars on my heart, not allowing the truth to be seen, that it has been shattered and tag as irreplaceable.
You were my world, my everything, and cannot and perhaps will never love another as much as I loved you.
The fear is set too deep and the pain I dare not speak.
I try to open my heart up but I don’t feel anything for anyone but you.
...

I miss you in ways words cannot describe.
I miss the sound of your voice, your touch and the way your lips feel pressed against mine.
I miss how you hold me all through the night so gentle and tight.
I miss your smile and looking deeply into your eyes.
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The days drift on turning to months and it feels like and eternity since you have been gone.
The memories are kept alive forever inside my mind and although the pain is not as strong it’s forever lingering and it comes and goes along with the seasons.
Yet I still find it hard to grasp that I have lost so many, so much and at the same time I gained new friends and love.
Still I will never forget and I will always keep the memories locked up safe and secure until we meet again somewhere on a mountain top with a sky so blue and the tears will no longer exist.
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I have finally moved on.
Free I am once again like a bird whose wings have been broken for far too long.
I cannot be caged, I will not be held back or told what to do for I am no longer a slave to an ungrateful lover.
No longer will I be a prisoner chained by my own will, for I blinded myself from seeing the truth and sat quietly in this darkness that I created so I could hide from the light.
...