Why Me? Poem by J.J. Woods

I want to crawl up in a little ball
To give up and end it all
But then everything I said would be a lie
To keep trying
To keep fighting
To keep smiling
But this is hard to do
It’s hard to be happy
I always ask “why me”
Why is it so hard to make friends?
Why is it easy to point out all the flaws in me?
Why do people find it easy to hate me?
Why can’t my family understand?
They ignore my cries of plea
They pretend they can’t see the scars
So I sit in the bathtub
With a silvery sharp object
Crying my eyes out
Contemplating if this is right or wrong
I’ve done this before
I always get up
Wipe the tears
Tuck the object back in my drawer
Then go back to my day
Like it never happened
But sometimes I fear
That maybe next time
I won’t stop myself