What To Do Poem by BrandiNicole Colbath

i want so badly to hurt,
to feel,
life can not be the same,
without you here in my life,
life is meaningless without you in it,
i have no reason,
no purpose,
this is so stupid,
why did you have to leave?
did you never love me?
i was just a waste of your time,
a nothing,
not even a memory,

you told me that you loved me,
was that just a lie,
a way to pass the time,
to lead me on?
what were your intentions?
just to leave me hurting?
do you have any idea how much you have upset me?
you made me feel so dumb,
and i believed every word you said,
but they were all just lies,

because you never loved me,
nor will you ever get the chance to again,
oh who am i fooling,
if you were to come here,
to where i am right now,
i know that i would give in,
i would listen to your lies again,
i would go through everything,
just to hear your voice,
telling me that you love me,
because i desire that the most.

do i deserve it?
i may never know,
because i wont question your choices,
because i trust you,
for what?
i dont know
you have done nothing right to or for me,
but i am at your feet,
you command and i will do,
and i think that you know that,
so you just use me,
but i am too stupid to try to move on,
for i love you so