Truth Poem by hated failure

I feel as though
I have been stuck
On him for quite
Some time now.
It is as though
Despite all the pain
I have gone through,
I can't stop.
I try to convince myself
That I only try
To talk to him again
Because I need to be sure he's safe.
That's why every time
I see him, I can't think.
Every time I think about him,
I can't breathe, like
My heart is just rebreaking.
Whenever I hear the song
And think of him, I feel sick.
I try to tell myself it's
Because I need to see
That he's okay,
But I know better.
I just can't resist
The pain.
But I have yet to face the truth.
The fact that I am only doing this
Because I know that, since he
Has obviously made his choice
And I should respect it,
I am just trying to keep myself together.
The fact that I trusted him so much
Still proves difficult
Because when I think of him,
Someone mentions him,
Or I see his face in my mind
(Every time I close my eyes) ,
It's because I am just trying to keep
Myself from falling apart.
Even If it means breaking into a
Thousand ragged pieces.