To Those. Poem by Ann McKinley

Failure seems like a constant patteren
Locked into my mind and its sensless chatter
Always concered at what I look like to other people
If I ask for to much, if I do enough, If I am liked, If I am loved.
I look at those with morals and goals and think that I should be more like them
But deep down a voice always says 'Tay you cant'
'Tay you cant' 'Tay you cant'
Over and over and over again
those words go through my head
faced with the choices of good and bad
I always choose the worst instead of the best
Deep down I know I dont deserve what I have
Deep down I know I deserved what I had.
Emotionally beat down, verbally abused
I have the desire to go on and be someone
Maybe not for anyone but my own
The self doubt is increased
and the confidence crumbled
my sould and my heart are black and bruised
I thrive to let out my internal sunlight
To show the world my underlying brilliance
That I too, can be my own genius
I have always been better with written words then with my own voice
Because my voice matters not
But my wriiten words can be read over and over again
Maybe through this I will become a legend
Maybe through this I will become a hero
To those who feel like me
Who thrive to be
who just live
without any way, or any purpose
Those who feel stuck
and beatin
Dont freight
your not dead
and your certaintly not alone in this