This Life Poem by Barnabas Ambila

If I had wealth, riches, prestige,
I would find something to blame for lacking the peace of mind,
I have not any wealth, neither am I at peace with myself,
Habits, trends and missions,
Eat my hard earnings while destroying my health.
Indeed I have achieved nothing.
I have found love, made love, lost love,
Broke hearts, dreams, ambitions,
My own heart in pieces, happiness avoids my door,
Temptations, illusions, confusion my daily visitors,
If this is not my time, my coin, my love,
My Lord, am loyal.
I have been to the North, and now the West,
Only the years have changed,
I have tried to hide my tears, cheat my fears,
Tried to cut my chains and face my pains,
Hope eludes me; I have kept my faith,
But sinned before my father and God,
I feel stains of blood below my heart.
These things confuse me,
Choices betray me,
Somethings control me,
I try to recount, but my brain resist me,
Every time am back to the top,
Undressed, ashamed, regrets, Insane.