The Crazy Cat Lady Poem by Charlie Parant

leaving the house for only short periods at a time
just long enough to buy cat food and kitty litter
stopping at the used clothes donation bin
and if nobody is looking
stealing a bag or two of the donated clothes
(not that stealing is right, but nobody
wants to donate clothes to dress up stray cats)
today is “Corky’s” birthday
she’ll be the one dressed as a princess
and if you plan on buying her something
remember she only likes the low-sodium Deviled Ham
she also needs a new tooth brush, (medium soft bristle)
“Buttons “ (Corky’s ex) will be there
he says he’s not dressing up, but my guess is
he’ll wear that new blue sweater
he’s still not over her