Edgar Albert Guest

(20 August 1881 - 5 August 1959 / Birmingham / England)

The Bachelor's Soliloquy


To wed, or not to wed; that is the question;
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The bills and house rent of a wedded fortune,
Or to say "nit" when she proposes,
And by declining cut her. To wed; to smoke
No more; And have a wife at home to mend
The holes in socks and shirts
And underwear and so forth. 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To wed for life;
To wed; perchance to fight; ay, there's the rub;
For in that married life what fights may come,
When we have honeymooning ceased
Must give us pause; there's the respect
That makes the joy of single life.
For who would bear her mother's scornful tongue,
Canned goods for tea, the dying furnace fire;
The pangs of sleepless nights when baby cries;
The pain of barking shins upon a chair and
Closing waists that button down the back,
When he himself might all these troubles shirk
With a bare refusal? Who would bundles bear,
And grunt and sweat under a shopping load?
Who would samples match; buy rats for hair,
Cart cheese and crackers home to serve at night
For lunch to feed your friends; play pedro
After tea; sing rag time songs, amusing
Friendly neighbors. Buy garden tools
To lend unto the same. Stay home at nights
In smoking coat and slippers and slink to bed
At ten o'clock to save the light bills?
Thus duty does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of matrimony
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of chores;
And thus the gloss of marriage fades away,
And loses its attraction.

Submitted: Thursday, January 01, 2004

Do you like this poem?
1 person liked.
0 person did not like.

Form:


Read poems about / on: shopping, marriage, respect, home, baby, house, hair, mother, fire, joy, pain, life, light, night, wedding, lost, friend

Read this poem in other languages

This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.

I would like to translate this poem »

word flags

What do you think this poem is about?

Comments about this poem (The Bachelor's Soliloquy by Edgar Albert Guest )

  • Rookie Paige S (5/25/2009 6:53:00 PM)

    I LOVE this! ! I was dying of laughter! This poem is hilarious, yet so true! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 2 Points Shelley L Baxter-Stanley (9/19/2007 11:32:00 AM)

    Amazing piece of poetry...I love how Edgar seems to write what is relateable!
    Another Great one!
    God Bless
    Shelley (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Matt Guest (11/16/2006 11:51:00 PM)

    Yes, my last name is Guest, and yes I am related to him. I never knew that his poetry, would influense me to look into the world of poems. (Report) Reply

Read all 3 comments »

Famous Poems

  1. Phenomenal Woman
    Maya Angelou
  2. Still I Rise
    Maya Angelou
  3. The Road Not Taken
    Robert Frost
  4. If You Forget Me
    Pablo Neruda
  5. Dreams
    Langston Hughes
  6. Annabel Lee
    Edgar Allan Poe
  7. I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings
    Maya Angelou
  8. If
    Rudyard Kipling
  9. Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
    Robert Frost
  10. A Dream Within A Dream
    Edgar Allan Poe
Trending Poets
Trending Poems
  1. If You Forget Me, Pablo Neruda
  2. Still I Rise, Maya Angelou
  3. Dreams, Langston Hughes
  4. A Dream Within A Dream, Edgar Allan Poe
  5. Daffodils, William Wordsworth
  6. I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings, Maya Angelou
  7. The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost
  8. The Rose that Grew from Concrete, Tupac Shakur
  9. If, Rudyard Kipling
  10. Annabel Lee, Edgar Allan Poe
[Hata Bildir]