The Bachelor's Soliloquy Poem by Edgar Albert Guest

The Bachelor's Soliloquy

Rating: 3.3


To wed, or not to wed; that is the question;
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The bills and house rent of a wedded fortune,
Or to say "nit" when she proposes,
And by declining cut her. To wed; to smoke
No more; And have a wife at home to mend
The holes in socks and shirts
And underwear and so forth. 'Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To wed for life;
To wed; perchance to fight; ay, there's the rub;
For in that married life what fights may come,
When we have honeymooning ceased
Must give us pause; there's the respect
That makes the joy of single life.
For who would bear her mother's scornful tongue,
Canned goods for tea, the dying furnace fire;
The pangs of sleepless nights when baby cries;
The pain of barking shins upon a chair and
Closing waists that button down the back,
When he himself might all these troubles shirk
With a bare refusal? Who would bundles bear,
And grunt and sweat under a shopping load?
Who would samples match; buy rats for hair,
Cart cheese and crackers home to serve at night
For lunch to feed your friends; play pedro
After tea; sing rag time songs, amusing
Friendly neighbors. Buy garden tools
To lend unto the same. Stay home at nights
In smoking coat and slippers and slink to bed
At ten o'clock to save the light bills?
Thus duty does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of matrimony
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of chores;
And thus the gloss of marriage fades away,
And loses its attraction.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Paige S 25 May 2009

I LOVE this! ! I was dying of laughter! This poem is hilarious, yet so true!

1 1 Reply
Shelley L Baxter-stanley 19 September 2007

Amazing piece of poetry...I love how Edgar seems to write what is relateable! Another Great one! God Bless Shelley

1 1 Reply
Matt Guest 16 November 2006

Yes, my last name is Guest, and yes I am related to him. I never knew that his poetry, would influense me to look into the world of poems.

3 1 Reply
READ THIS POEM IN OTHER LANGUAGES
Edgar Albert Guest

Edgar Albert Guest

Birmingham / England
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