Paradox Poem by John Dillenger II

In the dark, the deep, the gray
I will lose the fight today
For in the end I am weak
A pawn in the greater play of things
For in the end the words I speak
Are not the words I want to hear
The words I speak cut my heart
Through and through a driven spear
I try to seem so indifferent
But all I do is care
So when you leave the words I say
Should be my words of despair
I can't stand to watch you leave
But all I do is stand and stare
My eyes glass, my heart my fear
So easy to break despite my walls
The cage I built to protect myself
There is no floor, and I will fall
My walls will crumble in on me
For I build them to quickly